| Things just may be okay |
[Thursday, October 29, 2009 ] |
I MIGHT BE GETTING MY OWN PLACE AGAIN NEXT MONTH.
I've been staying at my mom's while she's been incarcerated, and I KNOW when she gets out I'll have to leave again eventually. She told me I could stay while I am in school to help me financially, but I know we won't get along... So I've been looking for a place.
And I found the perfect little starter home for me! A quaint little mobile home in a nice, quiet, well-maintained park in the country. It has 1280 square feet, a shed, a driveway, a small deck in the back, my own washer and dryer, dishwasher, AND GARBAGE DISPOSAL (which is really important because I think I cracked one of the pipes here from throwing up in the sink).
One thing I'm REALLY excited about it is that is has two bay windows. :) The kitchen is on the front end of the house and has a big one, and the master bedroom has one in the back end of the house. There's a second bedroom, but it's VERY small although the master is a nice size.
The inside is all wood paneling, which is not so pretty, but I think I will wallpaper it. I wallpapered my room here at my mom's in a sage green damask pattern and it looks very nice and classic.
I am turning in my tenant application tomorrow to the park manager and if I get approved I should be able to move in next month!
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| Modeling |
[Thursday, April 03, 2008 ] |
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mood |
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 cheerful |
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I submitted some pictures to a local modeling agency a few days ago, and I got their reply tonight:
Hey German,
Thank you for your recent submission and interest in the possibility of working with Peak. You are in a tough age group for the Iowa market based on the amount of work we book here however; you have a look unique to the talent I currently represent so I’d still like to schedule a time to meet with you in person to help me better determine what interest we would have in representing you. This will also give me an opportunity to provide you with more information about the industry and how our agency operates.
Let me know when you might have some time available during the week. I’m typically here Mon-Fri from about 9am to 5pm. When you come, I’ll need to have you bring a Polaroid photo/snapshot of yourself as well along with any professional materials (pictures/composites/headshots) that you might have. If you don’t have any, don’t worry about it. I just like to see what people already have if anything. I look forward to hearing back from you.
Thanks,
Steven R. Myers
I'm excited! I need to take some casual, UNTOUCHED headshots and print them off at the store since my idiot mother broke our printer.
Maybe I'll try to schedule a meeting next Thursday or Friday so I could exercise my ASS off and the not eat for three days before the interview, haha. Time will tell. Binge eating has taken over my life.
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| Oh No No No, Oh No No! |
[Thursday, April 03, 2008 ] |
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mood |
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 Panicked |
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I had a crazy binge tonight, although by the standards of my eatings habits of late I suppose it was normal. Oh but the ending was unlike a general binge, and I am truly upset right now because of it.
I ate four bagels with cream cheese, half a box of chocolates, TWELVE CUPS of rice with chicken, shrimp, and sauce, and half a dozen chocolate cream candies. The rice was the last thing I ate, and when I went to purge, some water came up and then nothing else.
It got stuck! No matter how much I pushed, nothing came up. It was awful, I started to really panic, so I shoved my toothbrush down my throat. I gagged and gagged but still nothing, so I kept sipping water and pushing it back out until a big chunk of bagel came up. I was finally able to get some rice, chocolate, and a little more bagel up, but I just know that there's still so much in me. I weighed myself and I'm three pounds heavier than I should be.
I feel so upset right now. I bought so many nice clothes today in all new sizes that I used to not be able to wear. What if I wake up tomorrow bloated and puffy and my BMI is 20 and I have to work all the way back down to 19 all over again?! I feel so awful, I feel like such a hypocrite, like a phony all because I couldn't get all the food back up. WHY!? I've purged full on at least eight times today before now, why did my abilities suddenly go sour after a RICE AND BAGELS BINGE!?
I'm aware this must sound like a lot of bitching and moaning, but I really need to vent. I'm just so worried. I really feel I might cry, no exaggeration.
FUCK!!!
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[Wednesday, February 06, 2008 ] |
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mood |
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 apathetic |
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I want to waste away. If I hadn't shot up eleven pounds last week, my BMI would almost be down to 18 by now.
And also I was in a car accident last night.
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[Saturday, June 23, 2007 ] |
 H E L L O
If you would like to be added, please tell me in a comment how I know you, where I know you from, or how you found my LiveJournal. There are some private issues in this journal, so I decided it would be wise to put up a safety barrier of sorts.
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ashtears / spritenite / tyler
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